Guest Meow: Negra

 I've been lazy with the toys. Ash can move them if it's that important. Ugh. I did leave a donut for Oswin but she didn't see it, ungrateful cat.

 Anyway, today we have another guest meow!

Name and location

My name is Negra, my parents are very original. Black fur? Your name is Black. I also had a sister called Orange and a gray brother called Griche (a word game on Gris, spanish for gray).

 

Cali's note: Negra speaks Spanish, so technically she is a guest miau!

Who do you live with?

There are 2, 3, sometimes 4 humans around. I have tons of sisters too: Elvira, Tricky, Gustavo... One of the other humans also has a cat, but she's not my sister. Oh, there's also this thing that isn't a cat or a human... He barks but leaves us alone, people call it a Boris.

What makes you meow the loudest?

Food. Food is my passion, I live to eat. I want to eat all the time, but I'm not fed all the time, thus the almost constant screaming. If someone has food, I must scream to get them to give it to me.

Cali's note: I guess starved cats is an international problem.

What's a spot in the house that is yours and only yours?

With so many beings in the house, there isn't really one. I'm not picky, I sleep on the floor, on chairs, on blankets, on my sisters... I don't need a dedicated space.

 

 

If you could only carry 2 toys for the rest of your life, which ones would you choose and why?

Hard one! I love any toy that moves, I go outside to catch them, but it's always a different one. They're half entertainment and half to feed the humans, they are terrible hunters. They always scream their thanks when I bring a new toy in. But then they get rid of it.

If you could bite anyone (or anything) in the world, who/what would you chomp on?

 

I'm not a biter, I'd have to stop screaming for too long to bite.

 

Cali's note: You can bite and scream at the same time, I'll teach you. 

 Tell us a story you're proud of

When I was young, I had kittens. The humans went to sleep and woke up to what they thought were 3 gray kittens. Joke was on them! There was a 4th black kitten that was camouflaged in my fur. Humans called him Negroncio and found good homes for all of them.

Anything else you want to tell the world?

Yeah, you got some food? I'm super hungry!

 

Back to Cali. Thank you Negra! It's nice to talk to my Argentine relatives, and hope one day we can party in person! Crossed paws and beans! 

What doesn't kill us make us meow

 It's been a while, I've been lazy. Where did we leave off?

The door was closed, of course. I had taken the guava juice and chameleon to the bathroom, so I only had access to them during the day. But I wanted to play with them, screaming, during the night. So I brought a protest donut and a protest taco. Yeah, I had a busy night.

I still had to wait until the morning to access the bathroom. Inconceivable.

At least they'd keep the door open overnight after seeing so many toys, right? Of course not, assholes gonna asshole. When I saw the closed bathroom door, I reacted without thinking and got a platypus. But got tired half way through, they'll get the message anyway.

Next morning when I got access to the bathroom, I screamed and screamed and screamed. It felt good... for me, The Assholes yelled to shut up, but they're not the boss of me.

I took a bit of a break...

Fought with Ash, slapped Oswin, ripped out hair in strategic places... you know, the usual. It was hard work.

Then The Assholes collected all the toys and I got so pissed off I didn't move anything. Fuck it, they don't appreciate my effort. I spent my nights just roaming around the house.

But then, last night, something happened that snapped me out of it. Ash had the gall to take his disgusting bacon to the bedroom. WTF. Moving toys is MY job, who does he think he is?

Does he just think he can leave toys by the bathroom door? That's my door, and my bathroom, he has no business there... specially with toys, WTF!

Out of anger I grabbed an egg, but I didn't want to contaminate it with Ash's coochies, so I left it by the bedroom door. But that wasn't enough, so I also grabbed a monster, but I left it by the stairs landing. 

Ugh, seriously? I cannot believe this. Someone needs to set this cat straight. This is unacceptable. Now I have to take time off my busy day to slap him. I was better off as an only child.

I can resist everything except the temptation to meow

 The door was closed. The Assholes picked up the toys at least, so everything was tidier. I started with a blank canvas, so my first choice was my guava juice:

 But that was not enough. I also decided that the stairs needed a sloth:

 What can I say, it was a busy night. There was a lot of screaming, but not in the bathroom. How hard is it to keep the bathroom door open? Imagine all the time it'd save!

The moment the door was open, I got the guava juice inside and finally I was able to scream and scream with my preferred acoustics.

 Then we all napped.

 The next night the door was closed. Seriously?!?. I had to add a protest chameleon to the mix:

 I don't think I'll ever be able to reason with The Assholes. They know I need to practice my screaming. Granted, I scream outside the bathroom, but it is not the same. Once the door opened, I carried the chameleon in, to be with the guava juice.

The door was closed again. Sigh. I carried an avocado to show my displeasure.

 

Also got so annoyed that I threw the sloth down:

 Unfortunately it didn't hit anyone.

We still have cameras supervising the triangle:

 So they captured the song of my people. Turn up the volume to hear my curses after leaving the closed door:

Dunno if the timestamp works, but it was 5 AM. That'll show them. I expect that door to be open all night or the night screaming will continue.

Fear less, meow more

 The bathroom door remained closed. Sigh. But the Assholes didn't pick up the toys and I felt like the door was a bit cluttered.

 I decided I needed a new place to dump my protest toys, so one night I chose the chameleon:

The Assholes had vacuumed on the weekend, so great opportunity to also leave some hair behind. They now have to either pick it up or vacuum again, muahaha.

Figured they'd walk by the chameleon on the way up and say "we better leave the bathroom door open for Cali tonight".

But the door remained closed.

I had to take action, so I added a shrimp and more hair the next night:

There's no way for them to ignore it now!

This time I even left some dark hair too. I better prepare to get rid of some orange for a full party.

Anyway, this is all done at night, so in the mean time some things happened during the day. We had a roommates meeting, observing proper distance because tempers get ignited when we're too close to each other:

And we received a delivery:

But the worst thing also happened. In the middle of the afternoon, for no reason, Ash was given wet food on MY counter. WTF, that's my counter. Probably my food too. Why does he get special treatement? Afternoons we get dry food, not wet! You can see in my face that I was not OK with this:

This sucks. I don't feel valued as head of the household. And the door was closed last night too. I had to take drastic measures. If they don't respect me, no more protest toys. So I got the toys put away. Or something like that:

I even got it all on camera. Turn the volume on, you'll hear my awesome screaming. It was a great performance, even without the bathroom acoustics:

That'll teach them! Bet the bathroom door will be open tonight.

Rage against the meow

 Last I talked to y'all, I had a great night in the bathroom. Last night I intended to scream my little head off... and the door was closed. What.The.Fuck. Who do they think they are?!? Screaming in the bathroom is my right! It's my destiny, what I was put in this world to do!

I was so furious I ran to the toy box but found the monster half way up the stairs, so I brought it all the way up and left it against the door. That didn't make me feel better tho, so I went downstairs and grabbed an avocado slice. Did I mention I was screaming bloody murder? It was something like this:

    Cali: MRRROOOWWW! (it means Open The Fucking Door Now!)

    Assholes: SHUT UP CALI!!!!

They didn't open the door so I didn't shut up. Shit was getting serious. I went to get a guava juice. Technically it is Ash's, but it's time he learns that what's mine is mine and what's his is mine too. So I left the guava juice close to the door.

They still didn't open the door, so I had no choice. I got a full avocado. The pineapple and the egg were from previous nights.

Finally they opened the door and I was able to really scream. The protest screaming was just a preview. I figured expressing my anger in such a productive way would make it so tonight the door would be open. That's what logic says, right?

Nope, the door was closed tonight too. Sigh. And I already had all those toys, did I really need more?

Definitely.

Funny thing, there are cameras everywhere because they're monitoring Ash. They're checking to see if he farts or whatever. That's what I imagine they're doing anyway. He remains stinky but he's getting better, I stopped following him and I only hiss at him if I ran into him.

Back to the door, I decided the door needed a donut, and a camera got me:

A protest donut was just what that door needed!

Bet they'll leave the door open tonight!

Meow is a journey, not a destination

 It's been a couple of crazy days. First, I moved the monster again:

With some white fluff too, so there's no doubt it was me. Dunno, it's like the monster doesn't deserve to go all the way to the bathroom, I cannot explain it. But the egg definitely belongs in front of the bathroom door:

Continue ignoring that disgusting bacon. That's all Ash.

Then The Assholes had to assemble a thing, so Oswin and I had to help.

They're so useless without us...

Where's Ash you might be wondering? Well, The Assholes put him in a box and then he disappeared for a couple of days. Oswin was thrilled. "Cali, look, I can stretch in my cat bed!". "Cali, look, nobody is chasing me off the table!". "Cali, look, nobody steals my spot!". I GET IT, OSWIN. OMG, dense cat.

Then he came back, but he smells terrible! It is my duty as his older sister to follow him around hissing to remind him that he stinks. No matter where he goes, there I am following. And hissing. Because he stinks. You're welcome, Ash. The Assholes keep calling ME an asshole. The nerve.

Anyway, the big event! Last night I went to scream in the bathroom while The Assholes got ready for bed, and dunno what happened, I think they were distracted, because they closed the door with me inside! It was awesome! I screamed to test and nobody came to kick me out, so I spent the night pacing around the tube, screaming and napping in the linen closet. Best experience 10/10. Gonna try to repeat every day.

That's all in Cali world, I'll post back once I have more news.

I believe I can meow

 The door was closed. There were no toys in front. I remembered my strike and all my wasted efforts. To relieve some tension, I moved the monster from the stairs to the living room.

But honestly that didn't make me feel better. I feel good when I play with toys while screaming in the bathroom, but the damned door is always close. I need to follow my instincts, I know I said I was striking, but I also need to do what's best for my mental health.

Short video, not much screaming was captured, I like screaming the moment I grab the toy. 

Ignore the bacon. That disgusting thing is Ash's, not mine. The good part is that they opened the door because Assholes thought I was so cute! Need to be cute more often.

I guess the lesson here is to be cute, put yourself first, and it doesn't matter what everyone thinks. I did the no toys strike for days, but when it stopped feeling right, I changed it. So believe you can meow and you will!