She believed she could meow so she did

 Another day, another closed door, another protest toy. Or two. A shrimp and an egg. I guess I was hungry.

Also the avocado disappeared. It was making me uncomfortable. Did I put that there? Whatever, I refuse to think about that.

The other day The Assholes left. We were alone for a long time, it was so freeing! They left the bathroom door open too. I started my day by screaming in there. I screamed and I screamed, I sang the song of my people, I performed a whole opera. It was great.

Once the screaming was out of the way, I went to scratch the carpet. Nobody to scold me, just scratch scratch scratch and my claws looked fabulously murderous.

Afterwards I took a nap on the counter. I made sure to rub my asshole everywhere, of course.

Next I chewed on the plants. There's something so satisfying and crunchy about them. They taste very green.

I was worried I was running out of time, I managed to sneak in one more screaming session before I went to make sure I had left fur all over the stairs. And the bed. And the carpet. And the counter. And the sofa. I was trying to subtly hint that this is my house, I hope they got it.

The grand finale was slapping Oswin and chasing Ash out of my rug, At my age it's important to get exercise, you know?

I was napping on the same blanket I was on when they left. They even made a joke about lazy cat not moving from her spot. Hehe, assholes, bless their souls.